humour
Moderators: PinkDiamond, John
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15613
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- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
A pirate walked into a bar, and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible."
“What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine.”
“What about the wooden leg? ... You didn't have that before.”
“Well," said the pirate, "We were in a battle, and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now.”
The bartender replied, "Well, OK, but what about that hook? ... What happened to your hand?"
The pirate explained, "We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook but I'm fine, really.."
“What about that eye patch?”
“Oh," said the pirate, "One day we were at sea, and a flock of birds flew over ... I looked up, and one of them crapped in my eye.”
“You're kidding," said the bartender. "You couldn't lose an eye just from bird crap.”
"Well, It was my first day with the hook" ....
“What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine.”
“What about the wooden leg? ... You didn't have that before.”
“Well," said the pirate, "We were in a battle, and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now.”
The bartender replied, "Well, OK, but what about that hook? ... What happened to your hand?"
The pirate explained, "We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook but I'm fine, really.."
“What about that eye patch?”
“Oh," said the pirate, "One day we were at sea, and a flock of birds flew over ... I looked up, and one of them crapped in my eye.”
“You're kidding," said the bartender. "You couldn't lose an eye just from bird crap.”
"Well, It was my first day with the hook" ....
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15613
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15613
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15613
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
Can anyone tell me what this is?
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
Re: humour
A beautiful preyingmantis
- PinkDiamond
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- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
Yes!! It's called an orchid mantis and looks more like a flower than a bug.
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- SwordfishMining
- Posts: 4269
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- Location: Denio, NV USA
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Re: humour
Orchid you pushing your luck with these puns...
I'll jump over my shadow. https://www.virginvalleyopal.com"
Opals & more at my ESTY store https://swordfishmining.etsy.com"
Opals & more at my ESTY store https://swordfishmining.etsy.com"