humour
Moderators: PinkDiamond, John
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15594
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
They're not from the cheezburger site, and they're not mine so no links were provided for voting on them like I do in the Funday Sunnies, but thanks for the heads up in case they were supposed to be there.
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15594
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- SwordfishMining
- Posts: 4262
- Joined: Fri Jun 05, 2015 3:06 pm
- Location: Denio, NV USA
- Contact:
Re: humour
You do find some good ones. Ive been busier than usual lately to even go looking.
I'll jump over my shadow. https://www.virginvalleyopal.com"
Opals & more at my ESTY store https://swordfishmining.etsy.com"
Opals & more at my ESTY store https://swordfishmining.etsy.com"
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15594
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER READS:
"We will heel you,
We will save your sole,
We will even dye for you."
A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK:
"Blind man driving."
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
On a Septic Tank Truck:
"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels"
At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
In a Non-smoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take
appropriate action."
On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."
At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming
In a Veterinarian's waiting room:.
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time.
However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted."
In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."
At a Propane Filling Station:
"Thank Heaven for little grills."
In a Chicago Radiator Shop:
"Best place in town to take a leak."
And the best one for last;
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises."
Irish Fisherman
The rain was pouring down outside O'Connor's Irish Pub.
There standing in front of a big puddle outside the pub was an old Irishman, drenched, holding a stick, with a piece of string dangling in the water.
A passer-by stopped and asked him, "What are you doing?
“Fishing”, replied the old man.
Feeling sorry for the old man, the gent says, “Come in out of the rain and have a drink with me”.
In the warm ambiance of the pub, as they sip their whiskies, the gentleman, being a bit of a superior smart ass, cannot resist asking, "So, how many fish have you caught today?"
"You're the 8th", replied the old man.
"We will heel you,
We will save your sole,
We will even dye for you."
A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK:
"Blind man driving."
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
On a Septic Tank Truck:
"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels"
At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
In a Non-smoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take
appropriate action."
On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."
At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming
In a Veterinarian's waiting room:.
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time.
However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted."
In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."
At a Propane Filling Station:
"Thank Heaven for little grills."
In a Chicago Radiator Shop:
"Best place in town to take a leak."
And the best one for last;
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises."
Irish Fisherman
The rain was pouring down outside O'Connor's Irish Pub.
There standing in front of a big puddle outside the pub was an old Irishman, drenched, holding a stick, with a piece of string dangling in the water.
A passer-by stopped and asked him, "What are you doing?
“Fishing”, replied the old man.
Feeling sorry for the old man, the gent says, “Come in out of the rain and have a drink with me”.
In the warm ambiance of the pub, as they sip their whiskies, the gentleman, being a bit of a superior smart ass, cannot resist asking, "So, how many fish have you caught today?"
"You're the 8th", replied the old man.
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15594
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- PinkDiamond
- Posts: 15594
- Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2015 9:30 pm
- Location: Ozark Mountains
Re: humour
PinkDiamond
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
ISG Registered Gemologist
· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ There are miracles left for you to do .... -:¦:- -:¦:-
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´* It all begins inside of you.
- SwordfishMining
- Posts: 4262
- Joined: Fri Jun 05, 2015 3:06 pm
- Location: Denio, NV USA
- Contact:
Re: humour
Hahaha almost normal right?
I'll jump over my shadow. https://www.virginvalleyopal.com"
Opals & more at my ESTY store https://swordfishmining.etsy.com"
Opals & more at my ESTY store https://swordfishmining.etsy.com"